Have you ever asked the question, why do my students come to youth group?

There are two answers, and they’re not always the same: The answer students give if you ask them directly (conscious or perceived motivations), or what really motivates them (true motivations).

To figure out what really attracts students to meetings, you have to watch them. What’s the first thing they do when they come in? What do they spend the most of their time doing? What do they seem to enjoy the most, and the least? Here are the five biggest motivations that I’ve seen:

Friends

This one is obvious. The number one motivator bringing students to youth group is their friends. This is true across the board, so it’s important to provide them with opportunities to hang out before and after meetings.

Games and the high-energy excitement

A lot of youth groups use games in various ways, from sparingly to all-the-time. This can attract and keep a lot of young students engaged (6th, 7th and 8th grade primarily). The older they get, however, games have less and less pull–and can even push away juniors and seniors that don’t want to associate with “kid stuff.” Be careful to not rely on games too much!

The youth pastor and other adult leaders

Strong personal relationships with students really keeps them coming back. Younger students are quicker to just look up to the youth pastor whether they know you well or not. The older students get, the more opportunities you have to build serious relationships with them, and the more important these relationships become.

The opposite sex

Students still come to youth group to flirt. Sometimes its inappropriate, but more mature students have also developed very classy flirting techniques to impress the opposite sex without crossing any lines of indecency. Sometimes this can be healthy and fun, but it can also lead to heartbreak and hurtful disputes.

Spiritual solid food (1 Cor. 3:1-3)

Sometimes it seems like nobody is there to learn about the Lord, but a select few in every youth group–your raving fans and spiritual giants–come to youth group sincerely hungry for truth and discipleship. If you let them down by playing too many games, you may loose your greatest chance to develop student leaders. Jesus’ taught the multitudes, but He pulled His disciples aside to show them deeper truths (see Matthew 13). We must be careful to give our dedicated and mature students opportunities to go deeper–and that starts by leading them there with our own lives.

What do you think about these five motivations? Did I leave any out?

Nathaniel Dame is the president of Called to Youth Ministry which provides the youth ministry resources, coaching, community and training youth pastors need. He is driven by a passion to promote effective youth ministry in the local church. Nathaniel lives with his beautiful wife, Christa, in Woodstock, Illinois.